All things being equal, yesterday’s festivities were relatively uneventful.
A few things worth mentioning though.
We went to my sister’s home at 11:30AM for our main meal. (We trade off every year. Dinner with my family, then dessert with his. The following year is the opposite, etc, etc…)
Around 2:30PM Husbandji was getting antsy as he
needed to go see his Mommy wanted to go to his family’s so that we could still go home at a reasonable hour.
Begrudgingly, I agreed, and as we were leaving the house, Husbandji let go of my sister’s heavy front storm door too soon, and it connected with my nose!
Ouch!!! Fortunately, there was no blood.
We arrived at the in-laws, only to find that they were still eating!!(Which meant that we could have stayed at my family’s a little longer. Grrr!!)
Of course the minute we walked in the door, Husbandji’s mother, (who henceforth shall be referred to as Tiamat (Thank you Ur-Spo dahling!!! The check is in the mail!)) without so much as a hello, started complaining to Husbandji that her neck hurt!!
What was he supposed to do about it?!!
As their dining room is very small, we went into the adjoining living room to wait for them to finish their meal.
Of course this didn’t suit Tiamat at all! Even though they had spoken at least three times that morning, she started screaming questions to Husbandji from the dining room! She had to know how his dinner was and everything!
Sigh. What a cow!
Once everyone finished eating, Tiamat joined us. She then regaled us about how much she helped in making everything and doing everything to prepare for the meal. (They had her wash five dishes. How would they have managed without her?!!)
She then launched into her usual venom about everyone there (although she thinks that she’s being clever about doing it, because she tells Husbandji all of it in Italian! Little does she know that, although they don’t know what she’s saying, they do know what she’s doing!).
Shortly thereafter, Husbandji’s brother “A” arrived with his son, The Darling Nephew.
Tiamat immediately started shrieking for the Darling Nephew to come to her (which he wouldn’t do, because, at the tender age of two and three quarters, he already has her number!)
To get his attention Tiamat started making all sorts of noises. At one point she imitated a bird by chirping “koo-koo! koo-koo!”.
I immediately turned to my sister-in-laws and said to them; “No comment.”. Which elicited peals of laughter from them, and a dirty look from Husbandji!
After an hour of continued foolishness, Tiamat told Husbandji to get her coat, which meant that SHE was ready to leave.
Which meant that we were leaving too, as we were her ride home. (Can you believe the unmitigated gall of the woman?!!!) And of course, Husbandji said nothing (mainly because he was ready to go home too!).
So we drove her home, with her spewing venom and making inane comments (“Boy! It gets dark out at night!”) the whole ride home.
We dumped her off and went home and collapsed.
Half an hour later the phone rang.
It was Tiamat.
She was going to bed and was calling to say “Good-night” to Husbandji!
So when all of you out there think that you have crazy in-laws, think again….