Most of Saturday was spent in preparing for
Night of a Thousand IdiotsTiamat’s Birthday party that evening.
Which meant that every inch of an already spotless house had to be re-cleaned as though we were expecting a visit from the Inspector General. (Which, in a sense, we were…)
And on top of it all, Husbandji started coming down with a head cold.
When I suggested that we reschedule it, he wouldn’t hear of it. (Even when he’s sick, Mommy still comes first!)
Of course, Husbandji had to go pick her up as well. Heaven forbid that one of his brothers do it! So, while he was out getting her, I played host to the rest of the family as they arrived for the festivities.
We chatted and caught up while we waited for the arrival of the
Queen of the DamnedTiamat. Shortly thereafter, she arrived.
I don’t know what to make of this, boys and girls.
Because, believe it or not, Tiamat was actually pretty well behaved for the evening.
Now don’t get me wrong. There were still a few annoying instances.
Just not nearly the number that I have grown accustomed to!
Case in point. When Husbandji arrived with Tiamat, I went out to help him bring in the pizzas that we had ordered for the party. (He had picked these up on his way back from his mother’s.)
I mentioned that everyone had already arrived.
Tiamat said “Everyone’s already here?”
I replied: “Yes. We told people to come at 6, and it’s 6:30.” (Apparently she couldn’t wrap her mind around the idea that people might come to a party on time!)
The rest of the evening was relatively quiet! (I was starting to wonder if some family members had been replaced by pod-people!)
Never fear, dear readers! Tiamat did manage to come through with one good story!
Apparently, there is a thief in her community.
A very honest thief though!
She happened to notice that three of the four screws that hold the vanity plate on her car were suddenly rusty.
Which led her to believe that someone actually unscrewed three of her “good screws” and replaced them with rusty ones!!!!!
And the reason that she knows that they were stolen, is that she paid $1.25 for each of the screws, so she knows that they wouldn’t rust!
My response on hearing this story?
“Well, there’s a screw loose somewhere…”.
So, other than this and a few minor annoyances, it was the most normal party that I have ever attended with this family.
Which has me worried.
Because this means that either Tiamat is finally maturing in her old age, or, and I find this to be a scary thought, I am starting to think that all of this foolishness and mayhem is normal!
Pray for me kiddies…..pray for me…….